The Extraordinary Ask: Navigating the Surrogacy Journey

This isn't a fair request. We know that.

Asking someone to carry your child for nine months - to share her body, risk her health, rearrange her life - sits in that uncomfortable space between miracle and imposition. Two years into this search, we've learned how profoundly awkward it is to need something this extraordinary from a stranger.

That first potential surrogate did us a favour by backing out. Her honesty about the commitment saved us all from a painful mismatch. Since then, we've navigated the surreal etiquette of this process: how to ask without pressuring, how to hope without entitlement, how to wait without despairing.

The math works against us. Few women can be surrogates. Fewer want to be. Even fewer would choose to do this for us. We've stared at those odds until they lost meaning.

What we're searching for isn't just a gestational carrier, but someone willing to sit with the discomfort of this ask - the physical risks, the emotional complexity, the lifetime connection it creates. Someone who can say, "This is weird and huge, and I'm willing anyway."

There's no clean way to end this except to say: if you've ever considered surrogacy, we should probably talk. Not because we're your responsibility, but because this is how the miracle happens - through awkward, honest conversations between people willing to sit in the discomfort together.

The ask isn't fair. But neither is needing one.